So I was reading up on Pat and Jauna Cabbage's blog and found a "True Confessions" post, detailing all the dirty deeds from their pasts that they'd hid from others (mostly the 'rents). I thought it was sweet enough to justify making my own. Anyone else who feels the need to air out their dirty laundry, make sure and leave a comment so I know aboot it!
Here goes:
1) When I was a kid I had a fascination with egging things. I probably threw a couple hundred eggs off our deck onto the neighbor's patio and hot tub. One time when the urge to egg came on and I knew the 'rents were on to me, I went and egged my own bedroom window so they wouldn't suspect me. I'm pretty sure my bro Dave took the heat for that one.
2) When I was in the fourth grade I was pretty resistant to the idea of doing homework, and apparently my teacher thought that marching me to the library and calling my Mom every day would help in that process. Instead of just doing my homework like I should have, I ended up taking our phone off the hook every morning before I left for school so my teacher would just get a busy signal when she called. Yeah, she was pretty ticked.
3) I peed my pants in the fifth grade. It was the end of the day and everyone was reporting the number of pages they'd read over the previous month, and I really had to go. I wanted to just sit down and focus on holding it, but the pressure of standing up was just too much for me. I ended up peeing and then try to convince Dave on the way home that I had been playing in the snow and that's why my pants were wet. Wadayagonado.
4) When I was around nine years old I used to test out the saying that cats always land on their feet by tossing the neighbor's cats off our deck whenever they wandered into our yard. I discovered the saying only held true when I softly lobbed them off, but not when I totally chucked them straight down. Yeah, maybe I'm lucky I didn't grow up to be a serial killer, eh?
5) About a month after getting to the first area on the mish, I really had to duke it but my companion was in the shower so I ended up lining an office trash can with a Wal-Mart bag and took care of business. That event marked the official end to my self respect....
Ok, I'm thinking on that note I'll call it good. Don't judge me.
9 comments:
mike you ARE a bad bad boy
antie kim
Wait is this Mike or Jaime's confessions?
Melissa,
This is obviously Mike's confessional. You know it's his because at the bottom it says "posted by Mike." :)
Babe,
I bet your neighbors really, really hated you, am I right?
I love the true confessions! We play this game quite a bit in our house, and inevitably end up laughing our heads off!! I want to hear more! more! more!!!
Mike this is really really great. I have not laughed so much in quiet sometime. the funny thing is I did the cat thing also. but we would put our cats in a bucket swing them around and then let them out just to see if they would get disoriented. sad but oh so funny to see a cat stumble.
I miss ya guys.
When I was in my first mission area my companion was in the bathroom for way too long and I really had to go, so I peed in a quart jar and washed it down the sink with hot water and dish soap. I should've just saved myself a step and peed in the sink.
In middle school I'd stay the night at my friend's house and we'd run around town and pee on the door handles of people's cars. A couple times we peed into open windows.
Well my son - my angel son - you really had a mean streak didn't you? So I am curious, just how many of these 'confessions' do you think your Dad and I didn't know about?
LOL -amazing that you lived huh?
the jokes on you kiddo
Love,
Mom
Freaking hilarious, you make me smile Mike!!!!
Thank you
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