Day 30

Day 30-What have you learned in the past month?


Technically it's the 31st. I got behind. So, I wonder if this is asking what have I learned in the past 30 days of doing this challenge, or just what have I learned in general? Well, I feel like this month wasn't exactly the best month of my life. A lot of unpleasant stuff occurred. "Stuff." Like what? Oh, sickness and stress and a bunch of other stupid things. But aside from the crap, there were some learning experiences that I'm grateful for. This month I learned that you can try to plan your life, but sometimes the Lord has other plans for you. Not necessarily a bad thing, though. I learned that being happy is a choice. I learned that sometimes it's sad and hard to be myself. I learned that life is not worth living unless there is someone to share it with. I learned that prayer really does work. I learned that it's important to be passionate about something in life. Some of these things I already knew, but it's good to have reminders like this.

Day 29

Day 29-Picture of something you want to do before you die.

Meet Carrot Top.

Okay....that was a joke......


The only thing I really want to do before I die is be happy with my life, be happy with who I am, and have no regrets. Is that too much to ask?

Day 28

Day 28-Picture of you from last year and now. How have you changed?

March 2010

March 2011

Well, I haven't changed much physically. I've pretty much got the same haircut ('cept I seem to be parting on the other side now) and the same cheesy look on my face. Last March I was pregnant, and this March I'm pregnant too. Whaddayaknow? I've changed more emotionally. I've had a year's worth of experiences to attribute to that. I am still me, but I have grown and a matured a bit more.

Day 27

Day 27-What I would find in your bag

Cell phone, sunglasses, wallet, checkbook, organizer, notebook (for jotting down song lyrics in the car), tweezers, pocket knife, hand sanitizer, lotion, hand cream (which is different than lotion), gum, a fortune cookie, a piece of salt water taffy, fingernail clippers, keys, bee butter, 3 receipts, a pacifier, gum, floss, a safety pin, appointment card, a comb, 3 pens, an envelope, and a couple of cheerios.

Day 26

Day 26-Picture of where you live

Montana

Montana is known as "big sky country" or if you ask my husband, it is known as "man's country."

Day 25

Day 25-Picture of something you wish you were better at

I wish I was better at gardening. I want to be good at growing plants and food. I want to be better at using those foods and plants in my diet. I want to be more self reliant and self sufficient.

Day 24

Day 24-A letter to your parents


Dear Mom,
It's been awhile since I've talked to you. 5 years, actually. Your birthday was this month. You would've been 48. Wow, so young. I still don't understand the timing of everything. Maybe one day I will. I've been thinking about you more. Mostly when I think of you, I just think of all my regrets. I wish I would've been better, especially during my teen years. I wish I would've spent more time with you. I wish I would've gotten to know you better before you died. There seem to be a million questions I want to ask you now. I wish I would've taken the time to ask them while you were alive. I wish the kids could know you. I wish they could have their Grandma Laura in their lives. I'm sure you're apart of their lives in some way. I just don't know how or really understand it. I wish I could just call you up and chat. I know Steph misses you a lot too. I hope you watch over her. She needs to know you are there, in some form or another.
You know what else I feel sometimes? Anger. But, anger is not a good thing. I know I need to get over that. But I can't help but feel angry sometimes. Angry that you left so abruptly. Angry that there are things I never had the chance to say. Angry because I didn't understand you better. Maybe you didn't open up to me very much for a reason. I will never know. But you were a good mom to us. You did the best that you knew how to do. If anyone ever asks, I will always tell them that.
Well, just wanted to let you know that I miss you. And...that I'm sorry for a lot of things. Hopefully you will forgive me someday, if you already haven't. I'm looking forward to the chance of seeing you again.

Love,
Jamie

Day 23

Day 23-Picture of something you are afraid of

I hate cockroaches, (and pretty much any creepy, scary, crunchy kind of bug, but especially cockroaches.) When we lived in Japan we had to make sure we didn't leave dirty dishes in the sink, or food laying out, or water in the sinks (cos they LOVE water.) We only had a few roaches the entire time we lived there, maybe because I was pretty committed to keeping the house clean. It wasn't anything like some people we knew who lived in cockroach infested houses where if you went to get a drink of water in the middle of the night and flipped on the light switch, a million of those bugs would scitter all over the kitchen. But there was one night in the summer we came home from our dinner plans and I just had a feeling I was going to see a cockroach as soon as we opened the door. And I was right. There was a huge roach just waiting for us on the wall next to the door. I screamed and freaked out and then Mike and I both went crazy with the roach spray trying to kill it. Ahhh, memories.

Here are some facts I just looked up. Pretty freaking disgusting if you ask me.

Fact: The German cockroach is the most common house infesting cockroach and the number one pest in the United States.

Fact: The cockroach can live without its head for an entire week.

Fact: The word cockroach comes from the Spanish word "cucaracha" which means "crazy bug".

Fact: There are about 4,000 different species of cockroaches in the world. About 50-60 species live in the United States.

Fact: The world's largest roach lives in South America and is 6 inches long with a one-foot wingspan.

Fact: Cockroaches will eat almost anything: left-over human food, paper, wood, leather, cigarette butts, tooth paste, coffee grinds, glue, soap, feces, fabric, shoes, paint, the glue on the back of wallpaper, human hair, fingernails, etc.

Fact: German cockroaches are very small. They can squeeze through a crack that is about 1/16th of an inch wide.

Day 22

Day 22-What makes you different from everyone else

Good question. I don't know how to answer this. Like physically? Personality? Someone else should write this post.

Day 21

Day 21-Picture of something that makes you happy

This little guy always makes me happy.

Day 20

Day 20-Someone you would want to trade places with for one day and why

There isn't one particular person I would want to trade places with. But I wish I could trade places with a rock star for one day. A beautiful, strong, female rock star with a great voice and killer dance moves to boot. I think it would be so fun to perform in front of a million screaming, cheering fans and just rock out.

Day 19

Day 19-Nicknames you have and why you have them


"Wee wee"---Because my sister couldn't say "Jamie" when she was a just a tot. My dad still calls me that.

"Jamus"---A nickname from my college days. Some people really thought that was my actual name for awhile. Also Jamus cakes, or just "cakes." Don't ask me why that one came about because I don't have an answer.

"J"---Because adding another syllable is just too much work.

"Jaybird"---Something my sister called me for a few years.

"Hi-may"---Which is how you pronounce Jamie in Spanish.

"Dove"---Mike has called me "dove" or "my dove" since we got married. I think it's from the movie Beverly Hills Ninja.

Day 18

Day 18-Plans/dreams/goals you have

Plans---Have more babies, clean the house, read to Vessel, organize my craft room, do more scrapbooking, eat better, wait for spring to get here, play games with my kiddos, take a walk, get back to the gym, dance party with the family.

Dreams---Never worry about money again, become a dancer, spend an entire summer in a hammock just reading, buy a piano, live with no regrets, have a swimming pool, run my own nutrition shop.

Goals---Move somewhere warm, learn more about photography, have a huge garden and a fruit orchard, get a dog, magnify my calling, raise righteous children, serve others, be a better wife, travel to other countries, go back to school, Family Home Evening, smile more.

Day 17

Day 17-Picture of something you love

I love art. I am not very good at creating it, but I love looking at what other people's brains conjure up. I enjoy going to art museums and just taking my sweet time checking out all the exhibits. I love sculpture, drawing, photography, and even architecture. But I think my favorite type of art is painting. I've been getting really into Salvador Dali's work lately. Looking at his art is like being in a dream.

Day 16

Day 16-Picture of you when you were little

The 3 year old version of me

Day 15

Day 15-Put your iPod on shuffle. What are the first 10 songs

1. Where have you been?---Reel Big Fish
2. Me and My Charms---Kristin Hersh
3. Hey Cool Kid---Cloud Nothings
4. Walking With A Ghost---Tegan and Sara
5. Nothing Left To Lose---Matt Kearney
6. Shake Me Down---Cage The Elephant
7. Parachute---Ingrid Michaelson
8. King Is Dead---Kent
9. Emotional Love---John Mellancamp
10. Jolene---Cake

Now, that was really random.

Day 14

Day 14-Write a letter to someone who has hurt you


Maybe some of you were looking forward to this post. You want me to tear into someone and use a lot of expletives? I'm sure the old me would have had no problem doing that. The old me would've jumped at the chance to write a long, hateful letter to someone that has hurt me. But I just can't bring myself to do that now. I can think of about 4 people throughout my lifetime who have caused me some significant emotional pain. But what's the point of writing an angry letter and stirring up emotions that I have been trying to bury for years now? Anger is like a cancer. It can eat you up from the inside out. I know what it feels like to let anger control your life. So one day I had to make a decision. Not too long ago I learned that the only way I could truly be happy in my life was to let go. That meant not holding grudges, not dwelling on the past, and most importantly it meant forgiving people who have hurt me. When I stopped looking at situations from the perspective of a victim, I was able to understand why some things happened the way they did. If I didn't focus on myself and my pain the whole time I could actually kind of see the reasoning behind the other person's actions. A couple of those people, I'd honestly say, had some serious mental issues. Not that it justifies their actions completely, but it does shed some light on why they caused me harm in the first place. One of the other people I probably can't blame for everything because I believe I allowed them to hurt me. A "friend" from about 11 years ago was constantly verbally abusive and demeaning to me. The first time it happened was her fault. Every other time after that was MY fault because I continued to be her friend and I allowed her to treat me the way that she did. I let her opinions define who I was. I could have stopped it by walking away from the relationship, so in a sense, I blame myself. But anyway, the truth is, everyone gets hurt. I know that I have hurt people too. It sucks to be on both ends of the stick, but it happens. The only thing I realize I can do now to be happy is to control myself. I can't control someone else. If I hurt someone, I can try to make it right somehow. And as hard as it is sometimes, if someone hurts me, I have to let go. Letting go can mean forgiving and forgetting and still maintaining a relationship with that person. Other times, letting go means the only option is to cut ties with the person who hurt me or do whatever I can to forget them. I don't recommend pushing the hurt aside and pretending it never happened. I allow myself to deal with the hurt and deal with the anger but then I just have to move on. I can't hold onto it. Because the fact is, I have a future and I see no other choice but to move forward in life. You know, nobody can change their past so there's no use dwelling on it. It will only make you miserable, and that's definitely no way to live.

Well, not the post you were probably expecting, but it's all I could think about writing at this time.

Day 13

Day 13-Picture of someone you miss

This is a picture of my mom as a senior in high school. This June will be 5 years since she passed away. I always miss her.

Day 12

Day 12-Something you crave a lot

ANYTHING that's battered and deep fried. And when I say anything, I pretty much mean ANYTHING.

Day 11

Day 11-Picture of one of your favorite memories

May 15, 2008--A beach on the island of Antigua. It was like we had the entire place to ourselves. We had fun playing in the ocean, lounging in the sun, and then we explored some of the rock cliffs that aren't shown here, but were to the left of this picture.

Day 10

Day 10-Picture of your favorite band or artist


When it comes to this challenge, I find it difficult posting just ONE picture.

This is Radiohead. They have been my favorite band since 1997 when OK Computer was released. Their music was the staple of my high school music collection. I love everything they've ever come out with. I loved seeing them live in SLC. They truly are musical geniuses.

This next band is The Pixies. They also hold a very dear place in my heart. They have a unique sound, but very different than Radiohead in pretty much every way. Unfortunately, I've never had the chance to see them live, but I love every album they've ever made. I started getting into their music long after they had been established in the music world, so I can't claim to be one of those die hard fans who was there from the beginning. But I love them none-the-less.

The music from both of these bands have had a huge impact on my life because I have many life memories attached to the songs they've written.

Day 9

Day 9-Picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you

There is no doubt in my mind that music has had the biggest impact on me. There are some people in the world (including my hubs) who say they could live without music. But I couldn't. Music has the ability to make me feel things that nothing else even comes close to. I know this sounds dramatic, right? I seriously couldn't live without music. Just think how boring movies would be without music. Or dancing? Music has been a huge part of my life since I was little. I would play my grandma's keyboard for hours as a kid. I stole my parents' cassette tapes and listened to them all day on my little Walkman. When my mom passed. the only thing I really wanted was her vinyl records. I was a band geek for 5 years of my life. Music is what got me through high school. Music can change my mood in an instant. Some music can bring me closer to the spirit. Some music can make me want to cut a rug. Some music can make me forget my problems. The best feeling in the world is hearing a song and getting goosebumps from it. Okay, this really is starting to sound dramatic. But now you know, I love me some good music.

Day 8

Day 8-Picture that always makes you laugh

Nice tan, Gramps. EPIC FAIL.

So, our computer is sick which means I am at el librario completing day 8 of my challenge. A friend of ours is nursing our sick compy back to health, and that might take a few days. But I will find a way to continue my 30 day challenge! I'm totally committed. Anyhoo, since I'm not on my own computer I couldn't post one of my own pictures, so one off the interwebz will have to suffice. This website always has the funniest pictures and videos. Don't believe me? Check it out yourself.

Day 7

Day 7-Something you're proud of in the past few days

I kind of wish this wasn't today's challenge, because I can't think of anything I've done to be proud of in the last few days. I'm racking my brain trying to think of at least one thing that I can post here. I can name a bunch of things I'm NOT proud of. So how about I write about that instead? Hehehehe. For starters, I didn't accomplish much of anything over the weekend. I let the housework slide and the dishes pile up and laundry sit in piles. I watched more movies than I probably should have and I took a long nap on Sunday. So all in all, I've been pretty unproductive the last few days. Good job on that one, Jamie. :) Secondly, I'm not proud of my eating habits this weekend. I didn't eat one raw thing Saturday or Sunday. In fact, all I ate was junkfood. And it was REALLY, REALLY BAD, people. I'm kind of embarrassed to admit how terrible. But for the sake of interest, I will tell you. Saturday I had a bowl of cereal and a chocolate milkshake for breakfast. Then I had some Girl Scout cookies. At lunch the boys and I went out and I had a giant hamburger covered with ham and cheese and a side of french fries. That night I had nachos for dinner, some more Girl Scout cookies, and I might have topped the night off with a couple spoonfuls of ice cream. Yeah, holy freakin' crap. Sunday was no better. But, it's the start of a new week and I am happy to say I'm starting it off well. I had a big glass of water and a green smoothie for breakfast. So far, so good, right? And today I hope to clean up the disaster called my house. If I can catch up on all the housework and actually make a decent meal tonight, I won't feel so guilty about the slacking I've done the past few days.

Day 6

Day 6-Picture of somewhere you've been

During my senior year of high school, some of my classmates and I went on a trip touring the east coast. Here is a picture of me and my friend Jill at the Awakening statue located in Maryland.

During our trip, we saw just about every historical sight there is to see on that side of the country. Some of them included the Lincoln Memorial, the Jefferson Memorial, Mt. Vernon, Gettysburg National Cemetery, the Liberty Bell, the Holocaust Museum, The Statue of Liberty, The Empire State building, and The World Trade Center. We visited the Amish country of Lancaster, Pennsylvania and ate with an Amish family. We visited the Hershey's chocolate factory. We saw The Phantom of the Opera on Broadway. We even got to watch about 3 minutes of the Supreme Court in session. Lots of good memories. :)

Here I am with Jill at Fort McHenry

And if you look closely, you'll see me on the left on our way to China town in NYC.

Day 5

Day 5-Favorite super hero and why

Superhero: a fictional hero having extraordinary or superhuman powers.

So, you were expecting Superman or Wonder Woman, right? To be honest, I don't know much about comics or Greek mythology. However, the more I thought about this post, the more I thought about Jesus Christ. Maybe He doesn't fit the bill of a true superhero, seeing how, by definition, a superhero is a fictional character. But He does have extraordinary, superhuman powers. Do you know anyone who else who can raise the dead or walk on water? He was perfect in every way. He taught using parables. He also taught by example. He was kind and loved everyone despite their flaws and spread good wherever he went. He was humble, meek, wise, and obedient. The list goes on and on. Pretty much He has every quality I wish I had. Plus, He had the best comebacks ever. Go ahead, read the New Testament and tell me that He didn't have some great quips to offer the unbelievers. But in all seriousness, Jesus is my personal superhero. He is my Redeemer. He atoned for my sins. And for that, I will be forever grateful.

Day 4

Day 4-Picture of you and a family member

This is a picture of me and my sister on my wedding day 7 years ago. There was a lot of stress that day...what, with the botched up flower order, the basketball team ruining our reception set-up at the church, and the food order not being what we expected. The worst part of that day was how difficult it was for my parents. I was married in the Idaho Falls LDS temple, and unfortunately, my parents could not attend the ceremony. It broke my my mother's heart. My sister was the glue that held my mother together. My sister was the anchor that kept my parents grounded and able to make it through the day. My beautiful sister stayed cheerful and positive all day, making sure to crack jokes and keep us smiling. She's always been able to make me laugh, ever since we were little. She is one of the funniest people I know. I have a lot of great memories with her. Some of my favorites include working at Jill's Place together, floating the river, jumping off Monkey Rock, camping, and cruising around in her VW convertible with the top down. My sister has been through a lot in the past 4-5 years. She is stronger than anyone I know. It's hard to live so far away from her, but we get to talk almost every day. I am lucky to be so close to her.

Day 3

Day 3-A habit that you wish you didn't have

Now we're getting into the really deep and personal stuff, eh? You want to know some of my flaws? Well, I have plenty to share. Yes, plenty of horrible habits I wish I didn't have. But for this post I am only supposed to talk about one. (Phew)
One of my biggest habits is procrastination. Instead of just getting things done right away, I put things off, sometimes for days or weeks. And then when the deadline is fast approaching I frantically scramble to complete whatever it is that I put off. I think I work well under pressure, but I don't necessarily like all the stress it creates. I waste A LOT of time. More often than not, if I've got free time, I don't use it productively. And I always feel like I'm slow. And I don't mean stupid, I mean slow at getting things done. The dishes can take an hour. Ironing takes 1-2 hours. Sometimes I don't even switch out the laundry because I just put it off until it's the end of the day and then I realize I still have wet clothes sitting in the washer. Preparing a lesson for church can take several hours or days. Reading a book can take weeks or months for me. I get really annoyed with myself. I want to break this habit and be able to prioritize better so that the most important things get done first. Not only that, they get done promptly. I want to manage my time more effectively and stop procrastinating and just be faster at completing my goals. But how do I go about doing this?

Beet Burgers and What-not

So, I woke up with a sore throat, headache, stuffy nose, and body aches. Wasn't the best way to start my day, I'll be honest. I totally neglected the housework, including ironing Mike's work shirts that I promised I would get done today. Now Mike is in the other room ironing while I whine and complain about my day. I missed Zumba AGAIN. This makes me very sad. On the upside, I spent A LOT of time with the kiddos today, just lounging around. We listened to Primary songs for a good portion of the day. I had to put "My life is a gift, my life has a plan" on repeat at Vessel's request. It literally almost made me cry listening to him sing the words. It was sweet, don't get me wrong, but I think I might've just been overly emotional due to the fact that I wasn't feeling up to par. I was also quite pleased to have him read stories to me while I loathed in my own self pity. Sick Jamie=Lame Mommy
When Mike called to tell me he was on his way home from work, I hinted that he should pick something up for dinner to bring home. I wasn't feeling like making or eating the raw beet burgers that were on the menu. But, alas, the man convinced me that we need to stick to eating healthier, so he denied my longing for fast food.

So this is what we made tonight:

From this book:

I know, I know, the beets look like raw, bloody meat or something. But they turned out good enough to want to make again someday. Didn't satisfy my craving for a juicy hamburger made from pure beef.
But, at least now I don't feel so bad about the peanut butter banana smoothie I made earlier.
It all balances out in the end. :)

Day 2

Day 2-Picture of the cast from your favorite show

I don't watch much t.v. these days, but I've been a fan of The Office for a few years now. Some people don't find the humor in this show, but it makes me and Mike laugh until we're out of breath. Favorite character as of late: Kevin.

Day 1

Day 1-Recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself


1. My right foot is an entire size bigger than my left.
2. I'm a nutritarian.
3. I love making lists of things.
4. I'm a nail biter
5. I love being a Mormon
6. One of my biggest pet peeves is when someone lets the dish rag fall into the sink and sit for days in gross, nasty, smelly food water.
7. I like giving gifts.
8. I wish I was a professional dancer.
9. My favorite food is ice cream.
10. I hate to cook. Luckily, I have a husband who loves to cook.
11. I love a clean house (although, I usually have one room that is chaos. You know, to throw all the junk in while I'm cleaning.)
12. I brush my teeth for a really long time.
13. I love the beach.
14. I could hang out at the art museum or the craft store for HOURS.
15. I love to watch movies in the theater.

30 Day Challenge

It's a new month so I decided to participate in this 30-day challenge I saw on 2 of my friends' blogs. I have been wanting to be better at writing on my blog since I kind of neglected it last year. I think this challenge will be good for me because I have to post something every day. So check me out all month!

Day 1-Recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself
Day 2-Picture of the cast from your favorite show
Day 3-A habit that you wish you didn't have
Day 4-Picture of you and a family member
Day 5-Favorite super hero and why
Day 6-Picture of somewhere you've been
Day 7-Something you're proud of in the past few days
Day 8-Picture that always makes you laugh
Day 9-Picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you
Day 10-Picture of your favorite band or artist
Day 11-Picture of one of your favorite memories
Day 12-Something you crave a lot
Day 13-Picture of someone you miss
Day 14-Letter to someone who has hurt you
Day 15-Put your iPod on shuffle. What are the first 10 songs
Day 16-Picture of you when you were little
Day 17-Picture of something you love
Day 18-Plans/dreams/goals you have
Day 19-Nicknames you have and why you have them
Day 20-Someone you would want to trade places with for one day and why
Day 21-Picture of something that makes you happy
Day 22-What makes you different from everyone else
Day 23-Picture of something you are afraid of
Day 24-A letter to your parents
Day 25-Picture of something you wish you were better at
Day 26-Picture of where you live
Day 27-What I would find in your bag
Day 28-Picture of you from last year and now. How have you changed?
Day 29-Picture of something you want to do before you die.
Day 30-What have you learned in the past month?